Regulator investigating ‘wives submit to your husbands’ charity

A newly registered Christian charity in Wales is under investigation by the charity regulator after its pastor claimed wives should "submit" to their husbands and be "good homemakers".

The Charity Commission's investigation follows concerns raised by the National Secular Society.

Pastor Andrew Love, chair of trustees at Tabor Baptist Church in Llantrisant, delivered the sermon entitled 'Wives submit to your own husbands' in a now removed YouTube video uploaded earlier this year.

The Church registered as a charitable incorporated organisation in July under the charitable purpose 'the advancement of religion'. Charities enjoy tax reliefs and are required by law to act in the public benefit.

Wife is "the weaker vessel"

Love explains that marriages fail when a wife "fails to submit to a husband" or "usurps his authority". A husband failing to recognise his wife as "the weaker vessel" is another cause for failure, he says.

Is it "too much to ask" for a woman to "follow the biblical pattern" and "come under the authority of her husband?", he asks.

He explains it is a "pleasure and a gladness" for a woman to submit to a "loving" husband. Submission "also means obedience", he adds.

When husband and wife cannot agree "the woman will need to yield" to the husband's lead unless there are extenuating circumstances, he says.

Reciting from the Bible, he says a Christian wife's "chaste conduct accompanied by fear" may win over a non-Christian husband.

To this end, a wife should not "keep nagging him". He recounts a description of a nagging wife in the biblical book of Proverbs: it's like a leaky roof "going drip, drip, drip, drip, drip in the night. It's just irritating."

Coercive control

Love lays out that a wife's "key relationship is her under her husband": establishing friendships must not come at "the expense of her marriage" and "her love for her children must never usurp her love for her husband".

He says a marriage gets into trouble when a wife goes "running off to her own parents". Nothing "must trump" a wife's loyalty to her husband, Love claims.

He says a wife wants to come under her husband's leadership and direction in "everything".

A wife suffering abuse from her husband may wish to contact "mature Christians" or "elders in a church", says pastor Love.

Home Office statutory guidance includes "Isolating the victim from family, friends, colleagues and professionals who may be trying to support them" as a feature of controlling or coercive behaviour.

Last year, the Welsh government launched its "Sound" campaign to combat misogyny, coercive control and "toxic masculinity".

Welsh social justice minister Jane Hutt said the campaign was "really important as misogyny, sexism, violence against women - and domestic abuse, it's in the news every day and people talk about it as an epidemic."

In 2022, the Government pledged to make Wales the "the safest place" to be a woman.

Older women should help young wives become "good homemakers"

Love explains that older women play an important role in helping young wives submit to their husbands.

They should advise a young wife to be 'discreet in dress' and 'not to call attention to herself'. They should be 'chaste and pure'. There should be "no flirting", and wives should not let "men come running for you" because of their dress.

He says older women should help young wives become "good homemakers".

Wives must learn not to be "rebellious", "confrontational", "temperamental" or "stubborn". Instead, they should be "obedient" to their husband to avoid 'blaspheming the word of God'.

He concludes with a "little illustration" of a wife whose husband goes out drinking, wants a meal on the table when he comes home, watches TV and ignores her.

Her friends advise her that "this is not a marriage", but her pastor encourages her to "thank him" for being a hardworking man. She should not nag him and must treat him well, he advises.

The woman later returns to the pastor in tears, saying his advice 'saved her marriage'.

NSS: 'Taxpayer money should not be subsidising this medieval misogyny'

National Secular Society human rights lead Alejandro Sanchez said: "Pastor Love is entitled to his pronouncements on the submission of a wife to her husband. But public money should not be subsidising this medieval misogyny.

"It is patently absurd that a charity openly espousing the subordination of women is acting in the public benefit.

"The Welsh government says it wants to combat 'toxic masculinity' and make Wales 'the safest place' for women. Giving tax-breaks to wantonly misogynistic groups such as Tabor Baptist is actively undermining these efforts.

"For too long the charitable purpose 'the advancement of religion' has been used as a shield to spread misogyny with impunity. It is now time for it to be removed as a charitable purpose."

Last month the NSS referred two Islamic charities in England to the commission after they hosted sermons saying a wife must obey her husband and may not even refuse him sex.

Press coverage:

Regulator contacts Christian charity after concerns raised over sermon - Civil Society